TMNT-Baby Steps Chapter 3: Alone

The water began to boil over, pouring over the lid of the pot and dripped down its sides so slowly, fizzling and bubbling as it went. April stared at the water with a frown, reached over with much struggle and turned down the heat of the stove.

When she did, April leaned back in her wheelchair and sighed. It was only a week into being strapped to that thing and already it was a week too long. The red head glanced down at her legs which were now in protective braces and bandaged up.

April wiggled her toes and smiled when she could lightly feel them beneath the bandages. Not quite normal, but it was a start. She would start her physical therapy soon, and she couldn't wait to get it over with and walk again. The idea of having a limp made her frown again and remembered how the doctor told her she'd probably not be able to run or jump or...or...

"Are you listening?"

"What?"

April turned her head and realized she had completely tuned out a chattering Casey Jones a few minutes prior. The young man sat on her counter and crossed his arms with a 'what gives?' look.

"Maybe I should come back later..." He hopped off the counter and grabbed his coat from a chair. April sighed and rolled after him, her arms already weak from having to use so much of her upper body strength to get around.

"Casey...I'm sorry. I have a lot on my mind, okay? It's only been a week and-"

"So?" He turned and April barely stopped the wheel chair in time from rolling into him. She looked up at him from her seat, hating how much smaller she was now that she was forced to sit down.

"So?" April felt herself whisper. "Casey, if you haven't realized, I'm in a wheelchair, and-"

"I know, when are you gonna be on your feet again?"

"I don't know, Casey. I told you that already."

"Bummer," he mumbled and took out a cigarette, placing it in his mouth. April felt her temper rise. If she could, she would have swatted the cancer stick out of his mouth.

"Bummer? Casey, I told you I could be stuck like this forever and 'bummer' is all you have to say? And please don't smoke in my apartment, Casey. You know how I feel about that."

He rolled his eyes and continued to light the stick anyways and slipped the metal lighter back in his pocket. "Look, call me up when you're on your legs again. Then we can go out and do all kinds of fun."

Casey winked at her and April bit back tears. The second hand smoke wasn't helping, either. She watched as he began to head for the front door. April rolled forward but stopped a few feet when she realized she was too exhausted to move.

"Casey...that's not fair. You're not going to help me?"

"No offense, babe, but I'm not exactly a helping guy. My job is to mark my territory around town, beat up anyone who tries to tell me otherwise, party a little and tell the authorities who's really in charge around here. And as much as I think you're fun as hell, wheelchairs just slow me down. Sorry, doll. Call me when we can have fun again."

He opened the door, winked at her and slid out, the door clicking shut. April stared at it in shock. What did she expect? This was Casey. Casey who graffitis the city with his name. Casey who found entertainment in beating up gangs and scaring children. Casey who was held back many times in school and didn't know what a noun was when he met her.

"Casey?" Her voice cracked, not really believing her own ears that the sound came from her.

"Casey?" She asked again, knowing he couldn't hear her. He was probably out of the building already, down the street on that bike of his. Was he thinking about her? Probably not. He was probably already thinking about what Purple Dragon member he could scare shitless that night.

"Casey?" He was gone. And April knew she probably wouldn't see him again for a very long time. She gazed down at her legs, the tears finally pouring over her eyes and down her cheeks. He wouldn't have ditched her if she hadn't shattered her legs. If she hadn't been so reckless...she'd still be walking. Not worrying about whether or not she'd be jumping and running and walking again. She'd be out and about, smiling and laughing and not feeling exhausted from how much work it was to live life in a chair.

April clenched her fists, silently letting the tears fall. What did it matter anymore? As long as her legs were like that, things would never go back to being normal again. She wouldn't be able to join the guys on patrol, wouldn't be able to join Casey around town, wouldn't be able to get to the sewers on her own...

The apartment was filled with silent sobs as April tried to get a hold on herself with no luck. She knew she should go back into the kitchen to finish the pasta she was making, but her mouth was dry and her stomach didn't feel up to eating anything. She wasn't hungry.

April didn't know how much time had passed, but the apartment began to become dark and soon the apartment was bathed in shadows from April not having any lights on. She knew her food was wasted and the water probably evaporated by then from leaving the stove on.

She stared at the door bathed in darkness and realized she was alone. Alone to take care of herself, alone to writhe in pain, alone to look into an unclear future. April knew she wasn't completely alone, she had the boys, but even then she knew they'd leave her, just like Casey did.

April stared in shock at the thought. She imagined all of her friends gone, not being blessed to have them walk in with pizza and Mikey's bad jokes, be mothered by Leo or have Donatello's concern. The thought of it made something inside of April jolt. Biting her lip, April bent over, buried her face in her hands, and cried her hardest for the first time since her mother died.